We rarely think we are looking good. We often look back and we see a younger, prettier, many times slimmer self. Many women we have spoken to told us that they don’t feel like they are looking good today. The reality is that we will not see ourself looking better in 10 years time from today. Time is a tyrant and our skin will face the challenges of gravity.
In this ageing game there is a silver lining. In saying that you won’t be looking good, or looking better than today, you are also implying something incredibly powerful: today you could be more than looking good, you could be looking at your best!
How a negative message about looking good can be a silver lining
It is incredible how our own perception of ourself is the only reality we can see. Indeed you can focus on the fact that if you are not looking good today, tomorrow may be more challenging. However, you can also realise that al the things you are postponing today as you don’t feel like you are looking good will be even more challenging to be done tomorrow.
The silver lining is that if you are planning something that involves your look, the best moment to do it was yesterday, and the second best is today. Take the example of a boudoir experience: only few women who decided to postpone their shoot because they weren’t feeling confident about looking good actually had their photos taken at all. I am aware that boudoir is not for everyone, but if you are considering it, today is the best moment for it.
Romans had a saying: Carpe Diem. Seize the day. Live your life at its fullest. Looking good is like a pair of shoes, they will eventually wear off and there is nothing wrong with it.
Looking good with those few pounds on our hips
One of the main reason not to be photographed by us is the fact that many women feel they want to lose a few pounds before being photographed. Many women actually lose weight in time, but the truth is that the ageing sign can’t be stopped, and the more we grow wiser, the more our bodies seems to love those gentle curves and those lines around our eyes.
Yet, looking good is more in the spirit of feeling good than in the actual shape. We have photographed women over 50 which felt beautiful despite what they would have been thinking ten years ago. Those are the women who live in serenity. They have understood that looking good it about feeling good, and feeling good is about realising that today we are probably at the highest of our lives.
Is the glass half empty or half full?
The “looking good” debate and the fact that ageing we won’t look better is like the question about the glass being half full or half empty. Ten years ago I wanted to see the glass half full, even when things were not looking good, even when my body wasn’t. In time I have come to the realisation that it does not matter how water remains in the glass, and that the more we think about the glass, the less we drink that delicious water.
The water in the glass is to be drunk as well as our lives are ought to be lived. I have come to the realisation that looking good is about feeling in peace with ourselves.
Drinking the water, living the life, focusing on the moment.
Let’s celebrate today about looking good now
You can think that if you don’t think you are looking good today, things won’t improve in the future. This can be depressing, but more depressing of this is knowing that understanding we won’t be able to beat time will make us miserable. You can think that the glass is half empty, and that the more you will go on, the more the water level will go down.
…or you can simply decide to accept yourself for who you are, giving the future you invaluable gifts you will never have if you decide that today you are “not enough”.
I have decided I am enough. More than that: I have decided I am awesome! I will age, I will have more lines around my eyes and things won’t improve after gravity will have pushed on me for then more years, but in the meantime I will enjoy my life, appreciating all the small things it will give me. In ten years from now I will think the same, and I will continue to enjoy life.
If you want to spend your future being grumpy, I can’t stop you, but remember my words: carpe diem!