What is the image that comes to you mind when speaking of strong women. I have learned that visualising an Amazonian has nothing to do with strong women, as the physical aspect is the least important while defining them. Incredibly enough, in the last months we have known many clients who I can count amongst the most strong women I know. In their twenties or early thirties, they taught me three things that I would like to share with you today.
Do you want to know what they shared with us?
Strong women knows it is ok to be bossy
Strong women are often accused to be bossy. What I have always found unacceptable is that the same behaviour, in men, is seen as decisiveness. Why do strong women have to be labelled with negative terms, while their male counterpart are praised for the same behaviour?
Well, one of our clients looked at me and said: “let them say I am bossy, because I am. And I am proud to be!”
She taught me that people gives labels, especially to strong women, in order to tear them down. Being bossy, or directive, is a trait of character that push people forward. The key lesson is that strong women are not worried by what other people think of them.
Do you let someone else’s judgment touch you and question so deeply to doubt in yourself?
Strong women knows it is ok to be insecure
There are strong women that went through horrors that I would find extremely difficult to live with. Nonetheless for strong women, and strong people in general, it is not how many times you fall or how hard you fall, it is getting up after every single fall. Even if this leaves a mark. Another client, who went through hell and back, had her photos taken because of her insecurities. “I can’t look at myself in the mirror” she mentioned “and this is why I want my photos taken, because I know they will help me overcoming my insecurities”.
Strong women are not infallible, perfect or without doubts. They have insecurities, and they face them.
When overwhelmed by insecurities, do you stand up and face them, trying to discern truth from irrational fears?
Strong women knows it is ok to be feminine
Last, but not least, in the list of traits we decided to tell you about strong women, is their decision to embrace their femininity. This comes from one important misconception about being strong: you are a man in a woman’s body. This is not true. Your professionalism, your strength of character, your being a leader has nothing to do with man’s traits. It is about being professional, being strong and being a leader, not about being a man or a woman.
What I have been taught is that if you give away your femininity, you give away part of who you are. If you do, you stop being the unique person you are. It is absolutely ok being feminine, being womanly and being proud of being it.
Are you forgetting your nature in trying to show your strengths?
There are so many lessons I am going to learn about women, especially from the strong ones. The three ones I have picked this week are just the tip of an iceberg. Being strong is not the end goal, it is a way of being a woman without having to apologise for it.