In the past years, our lives have changed a lot, and learning the art of letting go had a positive impact in those changes. Letting go of negative thoughts, of resentment and of material things. Letting go of everything that made us feel bad. And learning the art of letting go has been fairly easy.
Learning the art of letting go has also helped us with the women we photograph. It helped us listening more to their concern and treat them as a hint of pain, more than source of complaints.
Do you wish to know know more about the meaning of letting go and learn the art of letting go?
What do you need to let go?
When we talk about letting go, we refer to all those negative thoughts that make us feel bad. The argument with our spouse, the resentment towards someone else, the anger and frustration we sometimes feel. All these things are the source of negativity for us. They make us feel bad, they make us unhappy.
With the term “letting go”, we refer to “letting go of what makes our lives harder than they might be”.
The four steps for letting go
- Recognising the moment. The first step in learning the art of letting go is to recognise the moment in which we are holding fast to negative thoughts. They are generally heated moment, when it is hard to see that we are actually irritated, frustrated, or more generally in a terrible place. We should just try to be present in our lives, living every moment without distractions. This serves to realise when we are living one of those moments we should be letting go.
- Understanding the roots of the pain. If you have been mindful enough to realise that there is something you should be letting go, it is time to figure out what it is. Are you irritated with someone, and if so why? What was your expectation that was not fulfilled. Understanding the root of your inner pain is essential to letting go and avoid acting on frustration.
- Realise that it is not about you. Having unfulfilled expectations is the cause of pain, that pain we should be letting go. Now, if you have understood the root of your pain, you should turn to the person or things that caused the pain. Without doubts you may be feeling hurt by the person you are getting an issue with, but what is she feeling? Stop thinking in an ego-centric way, and put someone else’s feelings and actions under the light. How are they feeling now? Are they hurt as you are, or did they simply act on their own accord because they did not value your feelings?
- Acceptance is the key of letting go. You have gone far, very far. You have realised that there is a pain, you have understood what is its root and you have kept into consideration someone else’s point of view. So you have reached the realisation that your pain is nothing but your personal expectations that are ruining your life. You need to examine what we just described and accept it. Life not always goes in the way we believe they should have gone, but that’s the essence of life. Accepting that will mean letting go of the negative moment.
Isn’t it silly to live unhappily?
I have been so stubborn to place my pride in front of my happiness. Yes, I have thought that someone else was wrong, therefore I should have not conceded a single point to them, even in spite of my happiness. Said like this it makes me feel a proper idiot; however, in the heat of the moment, placing myself at the centre of the universe, I have not been able to see the situation as it is.
Is being right so essential to jeopardise our own happiness? There is a quote I love, and it goes “I’d rather be happy than right“. Today, when facing one of those moments, I always try to recognise my pain, understand their roots, placing myself in someone else’s shoes and accepting things. I don’t need to win an argument to be happy, I don’t need to withhold a “sorry“, but I am able to do it only if I am mindful and present in the moment. Letting go is nothing but this, making your present a better day. Many times by making someone else’s life better. Be in someone else’s shoes and ease their pain to make your present free of your pain.
Letting go of your stubbornness, expectations and pride to live better.
Letting go of things
In the past years, I have not been a good consumerist. I haven’t given in to the urge to buy stuff. I have resisted the urge to have the new toy long enough to see that I do not need stuff in my life. I have certainly bought different things, but the letting go of physical things made me more focussed on my spiritual self. I have to admit that I live better in an uncluttered environment, where good friends can see me at my best, not because I am photo shopping my life, but just because I have learned the art of letting go and I am genuinely happier.
Are you letting go of all the things that bind you to a grey life?